10 simple ways to heal & Love your heart

Do you feel unlovable? Have you ever said “I love you to anyone, even to those you very much hate----a common thing in America?” Oh yeah! well, i know valentine's day is almost here and many people are already getting worked up about what to buy or give and what they might get. But the awkward part is that many of us live in self-hatred; and frankly many people are troubled, not knowing where our core problems come from, if they arise from within ourselves which we then spread it to others or from others who create experiences in our daily life that sometimes clouds our ability to love ourselves. Throughout our lives we are constantly trying trying to live up to expectations, and we slowly forget how beautiful we are. We slowly love ourselves less and less. As the old saying goes “how can someone else love us when we don’t even love ourselves” (or some variation of this). Another way to put it: how can we give what we don’t have?

Making a choice to be healthy by living nontoxic is one step in showing you care about your well-being and the well-being of others around you. This February--valentine month, i will like you to take a different look at love by allowing yourself to love your self more as you're by doing the things and following the people that makes you cheerful because it is by loving ourselves that we are able to love others. That is not self-centered or self-fish as some people might say it is. Because there is a clear difference between  loving yourself by setting clear values and a person been a self-centered Narcissist. According to Brite World self love is different from Narcissism and here is what they have to say about it.

 
"Loving ourselves, or self-love, is a practice alien to most of us because it’s often confused with being narcissistic and egocentric. Loving ourselves is actually one of the healthiest things we can do for ourselves. It can literally change our lives.

When we’re narcissistic or egocentric, we think the world revolves around us. We’re mostly concerned with ourselves instead of being concerned with others. On the other hand, when we practice self-love we learn to adore ourselves so we can adore others in the same manner. We learn to support ourselves so we can support others. Self-love heals ourselves allowing others around us to reap the benefits".




 Our first step this month will begin with Self-love reeducation as Brite World has taught us to.

According to Brite World "When we learn to love ourselves again, we start to reconnect with who we are. We begin to understand that the more love we give ourselves, the more love we have to share with others. We have an immense amount of love in ourselves. Actually, we’re pure love. Once we start tapping into this love, the sky is the limit".

 “Brite-size” dose of happiness
    To expand our consciousness, grow, and transform it’s important that we practice daily the principles we learn.


Here is a dose from Brite World exercise that will help teach us how to love ourselves more whether we are rich or poor.

• First we will begin by Loving our-self daily.
• Second, do this simple exercise each morning: Hug yourself and sincerely say “I love myself.” It could be challenging at first if you’re not used to actually loving yourself or if you feel that you don’t deserve love. If this is the case, look at yourself in the mirror while you say these words to help you buy into this concept.
• Stick with this exercise until it feels that acknowledging your love towards yourself is a natural and joyous process. You may also repeat this exercise throughout the day whenever you remember it.
• Repeat this exercise when someone acts unkindly towards you. This exercise will allow you to bring the love back to yourself after an unpleasant experience. It’s great to also repeat “I love myself” before going to sleep so you surround yourself with that love feeling before you doze off.
• Be your own biggest cheerleader.
• It’s great to have a support team to cheer us along our path, but it’s even better when our reinforcement is internal. We may tell others that they’re great and that they’re doing amazing work, but we hardly ever (maybe never) tell ourselves that we’re doing amazing work. We tend to doubt ourselves and think that others are doing better than us.
• Start right now by reversing this process and cheering yourself along the way. For anything that you do throughout the day, congratulate yourself. Let yourself be amazed by all your deeds. The point is not that these deeds were amazing in the eyes of others. The point is that you did them and for this reason they’re amazing, because you’re amazing.
• When our cheering team is ourselves, we can always count on it and reinforcement is immediate.
• Be kind to yourself
• We tend to be very judgmental and critical towards ourselves. We feel guilty for the things we did and the things we said. We regret what we didn’t say or do. All this guilt and regret can really weight us down. We’re our biggest critic, hands down. We’re often kinder to strangers than we are to ourselves.
• Start to notice the words you use when you talk about yourself out loud and in your mind. The words you think and say about yourself reflect your self-image. If you use unkind words when talking about yourself (such as stupid, fat, looser, and so on), replace these unkind words with caring, loving words. Words are very powerful as they represent our mental world. As you reverse the unkind words in your thoughts, you allow yourself to be seen through new, kinder eyes.
• Learning to love ourselves teaches us how to love others. The love, cheering, and kindness we impart on ourselves heals us from the inside out. As we embrace self-love, our love naturally flows into the world. And there is nothing narcissistic about that. “Self-love is a natural process. Love is who we are.”  

Other Tips that will be useful for your heart by Nontoxic Lifestyle.

 Reduce stress, noise using biofeedback, meditative or hypnosis music. A glass of organic red or white wine is also useful in helping reduce stress. Take out some time at the spa to reflect. Go to your local gym, Do yoga, dance and run at your own time.

Reduce social media junking conversations that adds stress to your daily life----deactivate (from the psychological algorithms that your cyber profiles)--take time to refresh then reactivate.

Laugh often---watch comedy; Be amused by the things you see and challenges you encounter as you focus on more positive things. For example, if someone knocks your plant over and apologies for doing that, don't stress the spill, Just say is alright or if someone pushes your button, just laugh out loud, ignore it like it didn't even exist and it won't affect you much because you have learned not to take things said or done by this person too personal with the understanding that the opinion they hold has no tangible effect on your life and after awhile they will begin to feel embarrassed by their behavior towards you.

Drink plenty water mixed with lemon---keep yourself hydrated, it helps in reducing alot of stress caused by hormonal imbalance.

Use caffeine products in moderation; if possible not at all. coffee may be okay for you but it has been linked to causing dehydration, irritability, poor sleep cycle that may lead to more nervous problems.

Get plenty of rest---sleep. Oh my goodness, if you have ever worked night job, you will see how important sleep is for the mind. sleep is the body's first line for renewal, rejuvenation, protection against aging too fast and defense against troubled immune related disease. when you don't sleep you become fatigued and your mind slows down which then results in unproductive behavior. So by all means do get some sleep.

Eat more chocolate!  It's more than wishful thinking for me— because chocolate can be good for you. Studies show that eating chocolate, primarily dark chocolate, may contribute to improved cardiovascular health and youthfulness"------ Hersey Company. 

Detox your colon and liver; get plenty of super foods----like sea weed, goji, vegetables,  dried super-fruits and high nutrient nuts daily. Remember your multivitamin.

Practice Good Hand washing and personal hygiene to help prevent diseases as well as boost your self-esteem.

Exercise 30-45mins every day.......you know your body best so set your own time as you wish. Not having a gym membership shouldn't discourage you, there are plenty exercises you can do on your own. For example, running, playing tennis against the wall, walking, dancing, beginning yoga and the list goes on and on.

Reveal your beauty but Be choosy about who you give your heart and time to. wear, eat and do those simple things that make you happy---cheerful. Remember You don't win by been complacent; you win by picking a route and sticking with the happy drive till you reach your destination---goal in persistence and patience. So if you pick a new relationship or job, ask your yourself this "are you willing to go the extra mile to keep and maintain it?  Been responsible for all your choices at all times and not saying Yes when you mean No, instead try this: I will think about it, maybe and i will get back with you on that". .......that is an easy escape i learned when you can't say yes or no.

Learn how to love the people in your life more and you can equally find ways to make your love for them known by been creative. For example, if you have a sister who likes jewelry, take some time to make her a bracelet to wear with her name engraved in it or if she like clothing, find out which store is her favorite and if just a simple phone call will make her cheerful, just dial the number, sometimes a sincere phone call is a better way to say i care....just checking on you like a friend or a sister or a brother. Sometimes it's hard to practice what we preach but if the things we say are important to us are really the things that are important to us then it is up to us to make the time and effort to achieve it.

Weekend Challenge: "If you want to know what someone really values most, simply look at their calendar and; their checkbook. How a person spends their time & money reveals what they really value most. We say our family and; relationships are most important, but our values are demonstrated not by our words, but by our deeds. Check yourself: What is the most important thing in your life? Are you actually living that way"? ---Darren-----Success Magazine

Examine your emotional, psychological, environmental--social and spiritual life if you want a balanced life.

Last, but not the least. Learn to love you for you---as you are while you improve because when you truly know how to love yourself beyond the artificial things, the people that come into your life will have a harder time abusing you and you will have a much fun life loving those you really care about--Be true in kindness---sincere with yourself because it is from here you will develop more love/care for others in your life. Avoid mourning past mistakes or been overly critical of your self as you make the effort to be better. Not letting go of the pain from set back or past mistake can really hold you back mentally if you do not keep your thoughts and actions in check. Like Socrates would say "an unexamined life isn't one worth living; so everyday take time to reflect on your daily progress and attitude towards yourself.

For some more Brite World Advice click here.

Fun Horoscope: This year NL (NontoxicLifestyle) Valentine color is Light Pink, we decided to give Red a break this year because Light pink to us represents is Anti-cancer, it is simple, love attracting, warm, cool, fun and friendly color filled with passion & curiosity.   Find your love-mate using the zodiac.

                                        

 Author
 Onyinye A is a freelance writer who specializes in nontoxic self improvement, green & Eco-friendly living, nontoxic lifestyle (preventing cancer, illness and toxicity) and everything related to organic living and the art of life. Her work has been published by nontoxiclifestyle.org, Ezine.com, and other online and print publications.